QUESTION - I really really love a man and I need you to help him fall in love with me. I know I'm only 15 but please don't say my feelings can't be real because I know that they are. If you could just make him feel for me what I feel for him then I know we could be happy together.
ANSWER - I'm going to explain to you why I can't. But I don't want you to think that I'm not sympathetic to your situation. The pain you are going through is very real and nobody has the right to trivialise it. And your age is irrelevant, you can be as much in love at 15 as you can at any age. In fact as the emotions tend to dull a bit as you get older, your feelings are probably more intense than those of someone in their thirties or forties. So believe me when I say that I do not doubt at all you have a genuine love for this man.
Love is a very powerful emotion and the power lies not just in the intensity of the feelings it generates but in the other emotions it brings with it. Reciprocated love brings security and even to a sense self validation. But a love borne only from manipulative magic would be a false love. If I did make this man feel a love for you it could only ever be an illusion. And you could never feel secure in his love. Equally it would weaken your self worth as a person, you would always know that your relationship was based on a lie and not on his genuine appreciation of you as a person. That would have a negative effect on any relationship between you but also you would start to question your worth as a person. You would become bitter that his feelings couldn't be real. Or you would become insecure knowing that if the magic faded his feelings would fade along with it. I know how tempting it is and I'd be lying if I said I haven't been tempted with this kind of thing myself once or twice. But manipulating somebody on this level would be to take away their free will and their right to be themselves. And it would devalue personal integrity both as a witch and as a person. Integrity might not seem that important to you when you are faced with this passionate intensity but in time the importance of it will grow. And you would come to blame yourself for what you had done to this man. And as the guilt eroded your integrity any happiness you had found would be undermined and gradually ebb away.
So I don't speak lightly when I ask you to forget love spells and move on. I'm not going to tell you that you will find somebody else, you may well do, but even if you don't and you never stop hoping that he will grow to love you it still isn't worth the damage involved to all concerned by taking his free will away. Even if you spend years with that secret little hope that one day he will realise he has always loved you, it has to be his choice and his decision.
Image http://www.sxc.hu/browse.phtml?f=view&id=1329956 (Ivanmarn)
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