Am I wasting time wanting romance from my friend?

QUESTION - After being on my own now for over 3 years and divorced for nearly 2 years, I would now like to meet a man who will love me and treat me good. I have know someone for just over 2 years and like him a lot, but nothing as happened and it's like just being a good mate, am I wasting my time with him. Can you please help me? Thanks BB


ANSWER - I'm not going to hedge on this one. In my opinion it is unlikely anything is going to happen. I'm not saying friendship can't turn to love and I personally believe friendship is actually the key foundation of love. But the more usual order is that love settles into friendship. It is rare that a grand passion springs up out of friendship. 

If it hasn't happened by now then chances are it isn't going to and I think you probably know that. If you loved him you wouldn't have been able to maintain a friendship this long without making it your feelings known and neither would he. It sounds a strong friendship but not one inclined to develop to romance.

To be fair the emotion of the grand passion isn't for everyone. If what you want is more akin to friendship with the mutual satisfaction of occasional lovemaking then possibly a frank discussion to that effect would prove to be fruitful. But I caution you not to settle for less than you want. If in your heart your yearn for all the depth a passionate reciprocated love can bring, don't turn to a man incapable of giving you that. Hold out for what you truly want.






Image http://www.deviantart.com/art/Romance-116762921

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